Here are our favorite tips to help keep the love thriving long after the proposal:
1. Show your appreciation. There are so many studies out there that prove that when you’re grateful for the things that are in front of you, you get even more things to be grateful for. The same goes for your spouse. When you show your gratitude for the little things they do, they get a little ego boost that will make them want to keep going out of their way. On the other hand, when we don’t acknowledge something that they feel they should be acknowledged for, the next time they get the opportunity to do something kind they will say, “why bother??”
2. Be light about it. Most of us take our lives way too seriously. Our job, our relationship, raising the kids, keeping the house clean- it can all feel like one big chore. When you take a step back and channel your inner child, you realize that all the things we stress about on a daily basis are not even that important in the grand scheme of things. Once you realize this, it becomes so much easier to be playful and silly in your relationship, rather than constantly fighting over the little things.
3. Find a project to connect you. If all else fails, commit to finishing a project together all the way through. While there may be a few bumps in the road (my husband and I may have had a small fight in Lowes when the spackle I found wasn’t the “right kind” of spackle- see #1) you’ll have plenty of bonding moments, and will be able to share the pride and joy once the project is completed.
4. Create some mystery. Connecting was so much easier when we didn’t know everything about each other’s lives, right? When you’re apart from each other (even if you have to FORCE time apart from each other- it’s important!) strive to write down five things that you want to bring up with your partner. These could be things like: “He has no idea what project I’m working on at work right now” or “I wonder how he feels about the upcoming election” or so on and so forth.
5. Practice speaking kindly to- and about- each other. This seems like a no-brainer, but if you’re constantly using the “I love them but _____”, then are you truly practicing unconditional love? Or are you gossiping? Next time you go to say “I love my partner but…” take a second and think about how you would feel if you knew they were talking about you this way. As a team, you should be united on all fronts- even when you’re not together.
6. Put the phones away. No description needed here- just put. them. away.